I've been hiding my reading for the past two(ish) months, haven't I? Not on purpose! HONEST! But am surprise no-one's called me out since I've come back from my blog break and with the past few weeks, I've said yes to quite a few blog tours and with me not wanting to overwhelm you with too many posts (I usually only like to have two/three posts a week. Max.), but I can not talk about it now, can I?
What have I been reading the past few months since I went on a reading break and a blogger break?
Ok, let me backtrack and start the story in the middle of June 2020. Yes, a whole two and a half month back. After reading and audiobooking a heck of a lot of books, I hit a wall. All the books I was picking up were two or three stars and were very "meh", I was loosing the energy to read/on verge of reading slump and blog at the same time. I just felt run down.
So, I did a mini, under the radar, taking a break from reading and blogging. Reading was ok as I reread a book I love (Sabriel by Garth Nix) and I found myself jumping straight back into audiobooking. Reading took a little while longer.
But blogging. Blogging has taken longer. And I think it's because I've lost my spark and my energy for it. Don't get me wrong, I like blogging and I like being involved in the bookish world in my small way. But there are days where I couldn't muster the energy to write a post as "What is the point?! No one reads my blog, I feel like I've outgrown the community because of The Weekly Drama and am putting so much time/effort/thought into these posts and yet, am getting so little back lately? What is the point?!"
Oh yes, the I Should Quit Book Blogging voice has come back again, making its yearly appearance. But this time, this time, I'm actually listening to it and thinking about my reasons. I think, also, I felt like I lost my voice. I lost my space. Am I a YA book blogger? Am I now adult? Crime? Fantasy? Who am I?
So, been thinking about who I am now as a book blogger?
And the answer is ... I don't know.
I still read, I still blog, so maybe what I should do is using the blog to figure it out. Which means, maybe, changing the way I use the blog. For example, should I write-up every book I read or should have write-up one or two fuller reviews on the Pewter Wolf and do short, snapper reviews on Goodreads and change/delete some of my social media platform and try new bookish social media (which is the idea I'm leaning towards at the moment)? Or, find a nice medium between the two?
Should I change what books/audiobooks I read? Am I still happy reading YA or should I change my focus to something a bit more grown-up? Should I take bigger risks, experiment a little more with genres I both love and don't read in often/at all? Or should I admit to myself that writing the Pewter Wolf isn't giving me the same joy it use to and, if I want to keep going, I need to admit this and adjust? Or is the just the fact that it's been such a hot summer that my brain can't cope?
I don't know. And I'm not sure if/when I will know. But I think I've lost my voice and my likes along the way, hence why I fear it might have gone stale and I've lost my spark, so I need to find them again. So, maybe the next few months, things will change on here. It's going to be a bit trial and error for the next few months till I find something I feel comfortable and proud of. So, forgive me in advance, but I'm going to try and figure it out and make Pewter Wolf more... me
Join me while I figure this out, won't you?